A mundane coincidence turns into a mild obsession with the uniquely tragic life of a 7’7” Indiana woman who died a folk hero.
I write a lot about the struggles of being tall but very few of us had to struggle as much as Sandy Allen. She handled being a tall woman with grace and I’m very tempted to track down her motivational video “It’s Okay to Be Different.” Do you think it’s still available by calling 1-888-BIG-SANDY?
I realize it’s weird to start a four month hiatus by jumping in on SNL’s latest comedic misstep. And I want to say that this post has nothing to do with the controversial racial portion of the sketch and its resulting public outcry. This is just about how I relate to Leslie Jones, six foot tall girl to six foot tall girl.
I’ve spent a lot of time talking about dating on this blog. And I’ve spent a lot of time talking about how being tall also makes it difficult to feel feminine. And those two ideas are at the root of Leslie Jones’ sketch.
It’s easy to be looked over by men because of your height. Well, technically it’s very difficult but that’s another matter… You can’t seem to get a date because you don’t fit the dainty ideal of womanhood.
Do you know how many of my guys friends have commented on how I could probably hold my own in a fight? I guess it’s flattering but it doesn’t make you feel like a “lady.” There are plenty of times when I’ve been thankful for my height and the independence it has allowed me. But it can also be lonely, isolating, and frustrating.
And I am also very aware that my children will probably also be tall. And while I won’t be birthing the next Shaq. I might raise the next…who’s super white and tall? Conan O’Brien?
So while Leslie Jones might have framed her frustration in a way that made people uncomfortable, as a fellow tall person, I understand her pain.
Tall Girl’s Guide wanted to provide a few helpful suggestions for getting through the holidays as a tall girl:
1. Don’t have a Christmas Tree? Cover yourself in lights and let your friends hang ornaments off you!
You’ll be the hit of the town as your very own personal christmas tree!
2. Avoid awkward work holiday hook ups by being taller than the mistletoe!
It officially doesn’t cover as standing under the mistletoe if you are eye level with it. (Feel free to bend the rules if you want to kiss the person)
3. Win every shopping fight by aggressive shoving.
Whether you hit up Black Friday or are still braving the mall, simply reach out and start knocking people down. Plus you can hold a lot more goods in those long arms than average.
4. Choose the best TSA line
The only perk to being a tall person at the airport is that you have the best view of all the lines at security. Scoop out the shortest while everyone else is eye level with your freshly taken off shoes.
5. When drunk, reach up and pluck the star off of your family’s christmas tree and place it on your head. It’s hilarious. Trust me.
Perhaps this one isn’t the best idea.
6. When lighting the menorah, claim that you too are also a miracle.
I mean have you seen the percentage. We’re as rare as 7 day long burning oil! Give us a holiday!
I here at Tall Girl’s Guide hopes everyone has a wonderful holiday filled with family, friends, and long pants!
See you in 2014!
Last night I was at a party where the hosts were both pretty short. I wanted to compliment them on being so height appropriate for each other but didn’t because I didn’t want to be rude.
But is it rude to enjoy seeing short people dating short people? For once it’s not a tiny girl dating a tall guy. They were so perfectly matched - I bet they can reach everything in their kitchen because no one is putting stuff away on too high a shelf.
It’s just so hard when it comes to height and dating. I know plenty of great short guys who are struggling to find love and some fantastic tall girls who are trying to do the same.
So it’s just nice when too people find love on the same plane and I think it’s worth complimenting.
BuzzFeed made a video based on their list of tall girl problems. I do enjoy accidental footsie - that’s gotten me in trouble a few times.
As a tall lady, I feel like I have to be strong all the time. Every once in a while, you want to be held, like really held, and made to feel safe and secure.
I think this cartoon really shows that. Except now I want the counterpoint cartoon about how freaking awesome it is to be strong, powerful, and tall because sometimes I love being that too.
I actually can’t hear you from up here.
Buzzfeed has clearly been stealing from my blog…
Yeah! I’ll take that as a win for tall ladies.
Last Tuesday, I was at Disneyland for my birthday. Whenever I’m in a crowded place with lots of children, I end up running into them - a lot. It’s not my fault that they aren’t in my field of vision! And they run around in random patterns and stop randomly. It’s like they are begging for me to trip over them.
Then I do and they fall and start crying and their mom looks at me like you horrible monster. This is what Frankenstein’s Monster must have felt like.
So we’re walking through the crowds with my elbows hitting whatever child happens to be that height when I notice up ahead a dad clocking his child in the head (by accident, of course). The dad apologizes and the kid goes “I’m always getting hit!” to which the dad responses with “Well son, you’re just at that age when your head and my elbows meet.”
Thank you, random dad! For acknowledging that children are just at elbow height and we feel bad about hitting you but we just don’t see you! I’m not a horrible monster, I’m just minding my own business and trying not to walk into any low hanging signs.